Thursday, October 13, 2011

I want to feel good about a break.....

Wow. September 1st was the last time I had written. As week by week went by, I constantly thought about writing, thinking daily about adventures and things I wanted to try. The weeks have gone by quickly and here we are in mid October.  I guess I haven't been writing because I've been too darn busy trying to get my new job in place. Not to mention trying to be everything else on my wish list.

This past weekend I let it all go. I did have a very eventful weekend, we threw a gathering for my dad at our house, which I will write about later, which turned into a long evening with my sisters and friends. After all of it though, I was tired and I just wanted to do nothing. I do have a lazy afternoon every once and awhile but after a couple of hours, I snap out of it or I do 10 different things before I bring on the lazy. I didn't even want to think about caring about anything. All the things I want to be were pushed to the side. I ate bad, I drank bad, I didn't exercise, and I messed up my sleep. This attitude carried on into the work week. I worked hard at work but after work, I have come home, made dinner and seriously just played on my computer until I feel asleep. I could have been writing or doing work but I've been playing card games!!! Since Sunday I have had a pile of clean laundry to fold on my guest bed, the dish washer hasn't been emptied, and my packed lunches have been terrible!! What is wrong with me? Worst part is, I haven't even really felt guilty.

A much needed break and a good dose of "who gives a crap" has taken over. It has been nice, but really, I do not like it. I do not like this feeling...I like caring about everything we put into our mouths and giving the pup a substancial walk everyday. I like getting 15 things done in a short period of time! I guess this mini mind vacation was needed because it took on a life of its own. I am slowly starting to care again. I did make good lunches for us today, Penny Lane got a walk, I am writing this and I plan on hitting the hay early (only a few games of solitaire before bed). It's been good to see that maybe I just need to take a few mind breaks before this monster shut down takes over again. Let's relax and enjoy.....when we need it, not just when it happens. I'm coming back but adding in a few naps every once and awhile.